E-Museletter

the weather has chilled, hibernation begins to sound dreamy, leaves are falling, and the holidays are in sight. welcome to november! i wanted to share ideas for self-care to ensure sanity now and into this sacred season.

1. set boundaries. do you ever have that feeling in your body of tightness when you've said "yes" and should have said "no?" this seems to be a common theme surrounding holiday expectations. for example, do you always go home for thanksgiving when you'd really rather sleep in, cook a pot pie, and watch the macy's thanksgiving day parade with your kitty? this year can be different.

2. when in doubt, draw a hot bubble bath. every night this time of the year, you'll find me drawing a bath to warm my cold bones, and just let go into a tub of tranquility. surrender, self-nurture, and escape email, cell phones, and life for 30 minutes.

3. cultivate an attitude of gratitude. spend time honoring others for their contributions to your life — a letter to a high school teacher, an email to an old friend, volunteer time at a local soup kitchen. throughout this month, think of one new thing daily that helps instill within you an attitude of gratitude, and write it in your journal.

4. sleep in. i think this and journal writing are two of the best forms of free therapy. if you're an avid planner, put "sleep in until 11" on your list and then you can mark it off when you decide to get out of bed.

5. touch. massage, reflexology, hugs, and yoga classes at tranquil space are all ways to experience the magic of touch.

6. pay attention to sensations. recognize how approaching a challenging conversation feels in your body, notice if talking to someone leaves your heart center feeling closed, pay attention to what waiting in lines does to your pulse. it's amazing how easily affected we are by all the stimuli around us. breathing helps but so does noticing if you continually have negative reactions to someone or something. chances are that it may be time to make changes.

7. be less reactionary. do you notice that after a not-so-lovely email, the initial reaction is to write back an equally not-so-lovely response? well, i've found that sitting on it (visualize a meditation cushion) makes a world of difference. taking the action out, sitting with the sensation, and reacting from a place of mindfulness will allow you to be more in control, especially when dealing with aunt helga over the holidays — "now tell me again why you're not married?"

8. begin your holiday shopping now. taking care of holiday cards, gifts, party planning, and outfits now saves you stress later. and you'll get better options, less crowds, better prices (day-after-thanksgiving sales), and can easily shop online without paying more for shipping.

9. practice yoga daily. even one sun salutation will help make your world more serene. you can do it subtly during meetings (eagle arms), waiting in lines (mountain pose), and while running around town (tree pose).

10. just be. breathe. listen to music. close your eyes. let yourself dream. relish in the present moment. you deserve it and your body needs it.

i hope that these 10 tips continue to inspire and inform your journey.

tranquilly yours,
kimberly wilson

"are you happy, mom?" "are you happy?" asks my beaming daughter as she does a naked jig around my defeated form. hhmmmmm....good question i think as i wipe tears of frustration out of my eyes. it had been one of those days. you know, the day when you spill hot tea on your new blouse, get a pimple (or two or three), have a nasty fight with your spouse and find out that you owe more money then you can comprehend to the irs? am i happy?

this is my experience with happiness. it is elusive, it doesn't come around often and when it does it doesn't stay very long. i tend to think this is most peoples' experience, we're just too afraid to say so. we all at one time or another fashion a façade for ourselves to show to the rest of the world. mistakenly or not we believe this façade to be a matter of self-preservation. weakness or unhappiness or suffering doesn't really fit the rosy picture we want to project to those around us. but chances are most of us know suffering much more intimately then we know joy. why is this?

stephen cope in his excellent book "the wisdom of yoga: a seeker's guide to extraordinary living" has a few things to say on the subject. he states

our reactions to many stimuli are programmed in – "hard –wired" through the processes of development, and further programmed through ongoing conditioning. the result is that we perceive not what is there, but what we expect to perceive. the very instruments of perception are programmed to see reality in one highly patterned fashion – and it cannot see any other. we see over and over again in our experience only what we already believe to be true (p. 118 ).

most of us practice some type of suffering all the time. we carry around ego-created stories which become the running themes in our lives: "the world is out to get me", "there will never be enough" and my personal favorite "i'm always the victim". i've honed this last one to perfection -- after all you tend to excel at what you practice most often, yes?

so if you can practice unhappiness can you practice happiness? patanjali seemed to think so. in the yoga-sutra, translated by chip hartranft, he states that "unwholesome thoughts can be neutralized by cultivating wholesome ones (l. 33). pema chodron in her book "start where you are" reminds us of the buddhist slogan "always maintain only a joyful mind" (p. 92). she says:

notice everything. appreciate everything, including the ordinary. that's how to click in with joyfulness or cheerfulness. curiosity encourages cheering up. so does simply remembering to do something different. we are so locked into this sense of burden – big deal joy and big deal unhappiness –that it's sometimes helpful just to change the pattern (p. 95).

so how have i been practicing happiness? i try to allow a sense of spaciousness around situations which usually hit me hard. when confronted with events i loathe i stop, i breathe, i allow, i practice non-reactivness (sometimes) and i laugh more. i am amazed at how a gentle non-judgmental intention to remain open and light creates more of the same.

and, finally, a recent study published in the journal for primary prevention indicates that employees who participated in intentional laughter yoga for 15 minutes during their lunch hour improved work performance and "demonstrated significant increases in self-competency scores in all areas, including assertiveness, optimism, self-regulation, self-acceptance and self-awareness" (the journal of primary prevention, vol. 28, number 2, march 2007, issn #0278-095x (print) 1573-6547 (online) www.springer.com/journal/10935).

now who couldn't use a bit more of that?

tranquiliT boutique is a fusion of fashion and passion in celebration of yogis' bodies and spirits! tranquiliT boutique carries a delightful selection of comfy and chic lines that transition from the yoga mat to the market or museum. all pieces are hand picked by kimberly, made of luxurious fabrics that stretch with your body, and designed for nurturing your yoga lifestyle. come in and browse our newly added chiffon scarves, long legwarmers, velvet tunics, and more!

tranquil space's own line of yoga clothing and accessories, TranquiliT, is designed for the style-conscious yogini and has been featured in shape, lucky, daily candy, fit yoga, the washingtonian, and the washington post.

TranquiliT eco-luxe lifestyle wear is looking for an addition to our team! click here for more information our new sales representative position.

it's november and the beginnings of the holiday season! tranquil space boutique will be offering new styles and palettes as well as some lovely gift packages for the holiday season.

as always, let me know if you would like to see something in the studio that we don't carry!

happy shopping,

joanna

karma yoga is the yoga of selfless action: from feeding the hungry, caring for the sick, housing the poor and helping all in need. it is also the offering of our ingenuity, inventiveness, wisdom, love, and connection to humanity. there are many ways to do this…through teaching, community service, the arts, meditation, charity work and more.

we've created a new karma yoga corner both online and at the studio to give you tools to connect with each other and the community. contact our karma yoga director niyati shah with any feedback or questions.